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December 29, 2005

When you're as sick as

When you're as sick as I am, this is what you do :
  • shake your fist at the people that you suspect infected you
  • insist on spicy chicken to clear your sinuses
  • eat cough drops until you have a permanent indent on the roof of your mouth
  • change pajamas 20 times a day -- this pair's too hot get the ones with shorts now I am freezing where are the ones that are flannel now I am hot again get the tank top no now I am a popsicle get the fleece bottoms no I'm all sweaty...
  • watch DVDs : Arrested Development Season 2 (some episodes repeatedly), Tao of Steve, Six Feet Under, Season 1 [yes, I am aware that I am almost 5 years behind], Gone With the Wind*, Garden State...
  • read books : Talk To The Hand by Lynne Truss (hilarious!), The Hot Zone (read about ebola while you are febrile -- good fun!), Silly Putty and Napalm by George Carlin (oh, uncle George!), Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut (good to cuddle up with an old friend when you're unwell)
  • convince the cat to lay by you, thusly : pull fleece blanket on your lap. Wait. Grey cat will be around momentarily to survey the situation and decide that the warmest place in the world to be is between your feet.
  • drink enough tea to make China rich
  • use frozen burritos as ice packs to keep fever in check
  • whine and cry
 
 
*I have been meaning to see this forever, so I added it to my Blockbuster Online queue and it came just in time for me to be sick. Yeah! I wasn't expecting it to be FOUR HOURS LONG, but it was and you know what? It was REALLY good. Didn't feel like an exhausting 4 hours (despite the constant coughing and sore ribs) and the theatrical version even allows a musical 'intermission' so you can go potty and get more juice : brilliant! So now, after all these years, when I hear "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" I understand the true weight of that sentence. Damn, that Rhett Butler.
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December 27, 2005

This is currently my new



This is currently my new favorite arm-length picture of us (as they mostly are).

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Yes, my hair IS very



Yes, my hair IS very Squiggy, thanks for noticing.

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December 23, 2005

My jealousies lie in stupid

My jealousies lie in stupid places. Flash your tits to my husband? Don't care -- I hope he tipped you a buck or tossed you some beads. Make a cool crafty thing? Oh man! Why didn't I think of that? For fuck's sake!! I've been messing with felt and beads for years and how did I never think of this combo??? Aiiiiiieeee!

Case in point [courtesy of Elfcakes] : Death or Cake flippy Here's the tutorial.

Just a heads-up that this IS what you will be getting for Hannukah. Prepare yourselves.


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December 22, 2005

I think I am like

I think I am like 100 years behind the times, but I just recently heard this information about Xmas, and it is pretty interesting.

In other strange holiday news, I have posted pictures of my tree and ornaments on Flickr to keep up with the Joneses. If you haven't finished your holiday shopping yet, I highly recommend the gift of Flickr. I got my Pro account from my dearest lovely, Styro, and I have uploaded 1701 pictures in the past 9 months. I use it on a nearly daily basis. It's the best. Just like Styro.


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December 18, 2005

So much for looking at

So much for looking at the light at the end of the tunnel -- I'm here now, basking in the glory of fresh air and sunshine and birds and trees and damn it's cold out here.

This past week was a nightmare of a week for me. I put in just under 60 hrs of work [yes, I am salaried and no I don't get any goodies for my efforts] which is enough stress in and of itself. But when 99% of your work is last-minute running around and begging and pleading and cajoling, it's sometimes all that you can do to stay sane. Honestly, I am not sure that I succeeded. By Thursday night when I got home [I've been working multiple events every day, that run from early morning until late at night, and never in the same location -- or even vicinity] from the last dinner event of the week - hooray! - I wanted to burst into tears.

Totalled, I ate something like 4 meals this week, slept about 20 hours [Monday - Friday], drove about 300 miles*, managed 15+ events, including 300+ people, turned in innumerable reports and exchanged over 1,500 emails. No exaggerating.

Needless to say, this weekend I was exhausted. So many things that I wanted/needed to do, but just couldn't bear the thought. I did, however, manage to watch enough movies to melt a human brain, which was the intended effect. Stretched out on the couch with a cat on my lap, happily kneading bread [as my mom says], with hot apple cider and caramel covered popcorn... it was lovely. My only complaint is that I have to go and ruin it by starting the process all over again tomorrow.


*bear in mind that the furthest, distance-wise, that I went in one day was 30 miles out. That means the rest was back-and-forth around town toodling.


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December 16, 2005

too many sugar cookies and



too many sugar cookies and a surprisingly ginormous bow make me a happy girl

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Sometimes weird parts of town

Sometimes weird parts of town make me laugh. I routed myself through Orange, via surface streets, to avoid the freeway after an event last night and saw the following [unfortunately I didn't get pictures] :
  • Pho America -- is this like faux fur?
  • "Highly recommended by the owner" -- HUGE neon sign on the roof of a restaurant
  • VHS, DVD, Income Tax -- now you can find that old VHS copy of Fast Times at Ridgemont High while having your taxes prepared. What a country!
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December 13, 2005

the valet pulled my little

the valet pulled my little dustbunny of a car 'round the circle and guess what? the gas light was on. classsssssy lady.

only MIA would give the valet the car with no gas in it. ha ha ha ha. I suppose he thought that I was afraid that he'd steal it -- being the rad supermobile that it is. ha ha ha ha.

*sigh* Cait, come over and we'll have some soup and paint each other's nails. Cheap entertainment is sometimes the best. And also, bring the gas can... just in case.


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**this is the part where

**this is the part where stupid me JUST NOW REALIZES that this posted instead of 'drafting'. Oops**

This is kind of where I am at these days : lazy and dissatisfied. A pickle of a crossroads to be at, because either one takes work and effort... and I am just plain out of both. *sigh*

Which is why I lept on the chance to escape the Cubicle Farm for 2 days when I heard Miss Jules was comin' to town (think Santa times 10!) and it made for an excellent excuse to set the ol' 'out of office message' and head down to San Diego for some clear headedness. Of course, I can never escape the electronic grasp of the CF and there were many phone calls avoided and unreturned (it's called vacation, people!!) and now that I have dredged out the laptop at 11pm Saturday night (party animal, indeed) there are 200+ emails waiting for me. Sure, it's great to be needed, but this is pathetic.

But I digress. Thursday was a lovely day spent strolling the Gaslamp District, Seaport Village, and waterfront of San Diego with Jules. The weather was pleasantly cool and the streets were uncrowded (I've never seen SD outside of a convention atmosphere, so it was actually kind of strange) and many pictures were taken [Flickr will be updated soon]. It was so nice to have Jules all to myself, I only wish that I had more interesting conversation to share!! I felt like Charlie with the golden ticket, and now I am in Wonka's factory, I can't remember if I like chocolate or not... very unnerving. All the same, Jules was a patient sidekick and graciously giggled through my inane conversations (she didn't even roll her eyes when I told her about the bad feet smelling contest!). For that, I am eternally grateful. Also, on my drive home the border patrol cop was hott. Made it not so bad to sit in traffic, I'll tell you what!!

Friday was a lot of running around and general monkey business, including rubbernecking a fender bender from our patio ("the guy in the white started it!!") until Miss Bliss arrived. At which time Ryan had to excuse himself to GET DRESSED ALREADY because he'd just been kicking around in his jammies 'til then. Oops.

Forever famous with our first impressions, our guests arrived to not one, two or even three, but something like 500 bags of trash, piled on the porch that didn't get taken to the dumpster yet. Oops. Then came the "would you like something to drink?" phase of the evening at which point the trip to the grocery store never happened so we had like apple juice, water, and mayonaise in the fridge (hooray for entertaining!!). Oops. Thankfully my guests were ever so gracious and settled in and pretended not to be all grossed out at our messy house and piles of trash. In fact, Bliss stayed on for the 3rd shift until I finally agreed to stop bothering her and let the poor lady drive home already -- it was something like 3am, but hey I was having fun, which is all that matters. Sorry, but it's the truth.

Saturday I woke up early to spend the day with Ma and Tweedle Dee [Dum lives out of state] and bake cookies. It was fun, if you like to improvise cookie recipes ("Ok, we have 3 cups of flour, chocolate chips, and green sprinkles -- find a recipe that calls for that!") or sound like a know-it-all ("Mia, how the hell do you know about seizing chocolate?"). It was a long day, and at the end I sat in the car for about an hour more chatting with Ma. Are you starting to see a pattern here?

Sunday we woke up early again to see Chronicles of Narnia with the Barrys. I thought it was really good, but I had really wanted to read the book again before seeing the movie, but oh well. After that, in a spur of the moment decision, we carted ourselves over to Disneyland (with a quick detour home for warmer clothes and lunch). It was freaking COLD and so amazingly crowded. We had our timing down just right, though, and by skipping the fireworks we ended up ripping through all of the "good" rides in just a few hours. Guided tours are available, please make your checks payable to me. It was a fat lotta fun, but we didn't get home 'til after midnight, then in bed by 1:30am, so I was dragging yesterday for work. But oh well. Better to have a busy weekend full of friends and be tired! Flickr pictures are coming, I promise!


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December 6, 2005

Tonight I had an event

Tonight I had an event at Dave & Buster's and there was another event in a different room that was some sort of cheerleading awards. Tons of families kept walking by and going in -- a pretty big group -- and then all of the sudden, I see this mom and daughter running out and the little girl (maybe 9 or 10) is hysterically crying.

Mom, consoling girl : it didn't say anything on the invitation, how was I supposed to know? Girl, sobbing : because.... Mom : well, look at me. I'm in jean and a t-shirt. I honestly didn't know.

**at this point, I figure it must be a formal event and they are horribly under-dressed**

Girl : but this happened LAST year [more sobbing] Mom : well, let's go find you something. There are stores all over this <a href="http://www.shopirvinespectrum.com">place</a>

I watched them walk out of the restaurant, still not seeing the problem. Another family was entering and greeting the mom & daughter. Then, as the other girls pass by : mom, we weren't SUPPOSED to wear our uniforms, were we?? I wore jeans!! Mom, are you SURE?

It was so sad. The little one was wearing her full cheer gear, with the curly ponytail and ribbon tied around the rubber band. She was all done up, competition style, and apparently it was a casual dinner.

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December 5, 2005

Honestly, he's more annoyed with



Honestly, he's more annoyed with all the picture-taking than the hat. It took more than 20 snaps to capture him without any wiggle or blur.

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December 4, 2005

alternate title : good reasons

alternate title : good reasons not to sleep in so damn late every day
 
I hate Sunday nights as a general rule. The 5-day work week just doesn't suit me. Actually, it's not the 5 days that wears on me as much as the early start time (yes 8:30am IS early, so shutee!!). I'm such a nocturnal person that Sundays always come as a shock to the system. I tend to kill myself to stay awake late late late on Friday nights (cram in as much 'weekend' as possible!!) and then the trend has started for the next 2 days, until Sunday night I am awake reading books about dead people* until 3am and then am a mess on Monday morning.
 
Here's a map of my Monday morning nightmare [even though it's still Sunday] :
 
Friday night
  • get in bed at 11:30pm, read 'til 12:30am
  • get up and talk to the boys 'til 2am
  • get up again at 2:15am and stay up cracking nonsense jokes 'til 4:45am [at which time I feel like a zombie and nearly fall asleep while crawling into bed]
Saturday
  • sleep in 30 minute incriments** until about 10am
  • get up, go to the bank -- incidentally the only branch open on Saturdays is 30 miles north of here
  • visit John and Joe
  • visit John and Rosey (different John, same Rosey)
  • go shopping, find holiday party dress [cute, I might add]
  • go shopping, find 2 presents and lotsa junk I don't really need but want. Damn Cost Plus World Market!!
  • dinner
  • wrap presents
  • watch SNL with Dane Cook [SuFi to you!!]
  • watch The Devil's Rejects [my boy Rob is a twisted fuck]
  • go to bed 'round 5am [not sure of exact time, but sun is on the horizon]
Sunday
  • wake up at 11am
  • 2 hour bath (not on purpose, was finishing a book)
  • ...after that, the rest of the day just kind of got away from me.
The things that I was supposed to do still aren't done : no <strike>Christmas</strike> Holiday Tree, no new rug for the living room, no massive amounts of laundry done [my closet is burping socks at me every time I walk by, hamper's full], packages not mailed, <strike>Christmas</strike> Holiday cards not mailed, CDs not burned, front patio not decorated with appropriate twinkly lights, the dishes are still in the dishwasher, etc.
 
It's almost midnight now and I show no signs of stopping (currently browsing the internet for a Peanut Butter Jelly Time ringtone) which is setting me up for a depressing Monday morning, complete with black circles under the eyes and mismatched socks. My only saving grace is that we're "full casual" at work for the rest of the year, so if I show up in a ponytail with a crumpled sweatshirt and jeans, s'all good. Bleh. If anyone knows how to freeze time to get more done, a better way to maximize your weekend, or a good housekeeper, hit me back.
 
 
 
*I need to update my library blog. I've been reading a lot lately, mostly about dead people, and so I need to chronicle my readings. In particular I re-read Mary Roach's "Stiff : The Curious Lives of Cadavers" and then started reading 2 other books that she referenced in her research, before reading her newest book "Spook". I also picked up some new (to me) books by Margaret Atwood at the used book store.
**I am having sleep issues lately and wake up on a schedule, which is probably why I am so damn exhausted.
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December 1, 2005

When sending out an email

When sending out an email message to the team, do not include an invitation to preview the new Mariah Carey CD set at your desk (without irony) and not expect backlash. In most environments you would have been frogmarched out to Tower Records to return that crap, but here (because we love each other) we simply sent words of encouragement ("what the fuck?!") and pictures of better musicians (John Tesh). Consider yourself lucky. And warned.
 
 
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Evan knows someone named Ben

Evan knows someone named Ben Dayho.
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